Somebody Once Told Me The World Is Gonna Roll Me
"Well the years start coming and they don't stop coming Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running Didn't make sense not to live for fun Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb."
To say I've been stuck in a rut for the past couple weeks would be a huge understatement. I've been questioning everything and receiving no answers. The day before graduation was when it really started to sink in that God has a plan and I have no control or knowledge of what that looks like.
Ever had those days where you feel truly alone? Where you don't want to reach out and talk to anyone because you only like a burden? Or what about those days where you worked so hard and then still didn't receive the reward from it? Better yet, what about those days where you feel like you haven't given back to the world in any sort of way and feel like a waste of space?
Those days are tough and lately I've had a lot of them but ya know, what? The days pass and every morning we're blessed with a new opportunity to change it. If you've been having these hard days like I have, I want you to know: you are not alone.
God's magic works in mysterious ways. Right now I'm in the midst of A LOT of serious changes which seems to countadict the fact that I also feel like I'm in a "waiting phase." As my close friends and family know, I am as impatient as they come. When I say I want ice cream, I'm practically already out the door and ready to go to Dairy Queen. The things that I want, my goals and dreams, have shifted (some not even in my control). The shift has created a long, slow, loud pause.
Through all the waiting has come evaluation (and RE-evaluation) of me, myself, and I. What do I like versus what do I love? What are my goals versus what am I doing? What do I ACTUALLY want out of life versus what the world thinks what I should do?
The future still seems fuzzy. There's no clear, direct path which leads to basically no plans. But isn't that the best place to be? If I have the right tools and work ethic, can't I go anywhere? Do anything?
Answer for all you guys who are all also confused with life: YES!
Days will pass by without you knowing and sooner rather than later, you'll realize that this life isn't as long as you once thought it was. BUT to get to where you want to be, you need to be patient, and listen to what God is calling you to do. Most of the time, what you THINK you want to do and the plans you want to make aren't what is going to make you the happiest, best person you can be.
If you have any tips, tricks, hacks, or fun drinks 😉 that help you get out of your own ruts in life, I'd love to hear them! Any help is good help. Personally I've found that writing and taking a step back from social media has helped a ton but wine and Moscow Mules also seem to do the trick!
P.S. If you still need to listen to the song that's stuck in your head here ya go.