Some Not-So Late Night Thoughts
Updated: Aug 6
As 2020 continues on, I don't know about you, but I am EXHAUSTED. I know some may be thinking "your privilege is showing" and you wouldn't be 100% wrong. These last couple of weeks I have been working hard on trying to be the best ally I can be and learn as much as I can. I've been trying to stay active, up-to-date, and available to everyone... except myself.
This past year, I set a mini-goal to myself to not be so consumed with social media and the messages it holds both good and bad. Not because it's not informational or because I don't enjoy it but because it's tiring. Every time I log on, I expect horrific news to hit the timeline, and especially these last couple of weeks, it truly has. Our feeds that are usually filled with friend-drama or funny memes have now turned into full-on news segments and I feel like if I don't watch every single video and get every single update I'm failing as an ally and as a friend.
But my heart hurts.
My head hurts.
As someone who already holds a lot of anxiety in the first place, I've recognized (before the crazy year of 2020 even started) that I needed to take a step back and take everything lightly and not so literally. Social media is meant to be social but a lot of times it's not the truth.
However, that narrative has seemed to shift, which is refreshing and debilitating all at once. Now more and more people have been able to share and express their truths. People are sharing their stories like never before and I applaud EVERYONE who has finally stepped up or felt comfortable enough to finally take up space on the platforms you use every day, because you deserve it.
The flipside is fumbling through the rest of the half-truths or lies or horror stories that may or may not even be true. We're seeing real issues take light and we're seeing real villians walk along the streets nonchalantly, their narratives or lies taking the entire stage.
I believe in story-telling and I also believe that everyone deserves to tell a story, and whether we like it or not, there's not always a "good guy" and a "bad guy" but trying to figure out the characters and where they are on the spectrum of "good" versus "evil" is not always as easy as finding Waldo on a blank white page. There's always a different side, a different thought process to consider and this has been the heaviest weight to carry. Realizing, we all have reasons to do what we do. Most times we feel justified in our actions even if other's don't see it that way, but why? Where do these beliefs come from and why do we keep reinforcing them? These are the questions we need to ask ourselves and we cannot be afraid to change our thinking!
As humans, we need to ALL keep in mind that these times are hard, heavy, and unprecedented. We all make mistakes, we are all just trying to do the "right thing." We will get through this difficult year... together. It's time to give each other some grace and show some extra love. There families out there losing loved ones to a pandemic, there are others worried about dying just walking down the street, some are worried about dying on the job (and I'm not just talking about cops. Doctors and nurses are risking their lives every day).
We're all on high alert and once we regonize that, then maybe we can start showing each other some extra love. But it's gotta start with YOU. You can't pour from an empty cup. Take a break, breathe, rest, and then come back fighting for more. You're not alone now and you never will be.
I wanted to check-in, how are YOU doing? How are you feeling both mentally and physcially? There are literally no wrong answers. I just hope you know that I'm here to help and talk if and when you need it. Feel free to comment below any life updates (good or bad!) or shoot me an email for more privacy at firstname.lastname@example.org. I'm ready to help however I can.